A Downer Fellowship

[Fordim Hedgethistle]

There is no point to this thread, it's purely for fun.

If you were Frodo, and if the members of the Fellowship were to be replaced by Downers, who would you replace with whom?

There are two rules for this thread (so I suppose I'm one of Sharkey's ruffians):

1) you must work through the whole Fellowship
2) you must give a brief reason for each choice

To get things rolling, my Downs Fellowship would be:

Gandalf: the Barrow-Wight himself, obviously. Where would the Downs be without this mover and shaker, bringing it all into being and quietly but surely guiding it?

Aragorn: Estelyn Telcontar, just because she will be so happy to see this.

Boromir: Child of the Seventh Age, thanks to her formidable presence on the thread, and the fact that I'm not entirely sure about her motives.

Legolas: Bethberry is the most Elvish Downer I know.

Gimli: Himaran, simply because I am beginning to think that he really is a Dwarf!

Pippin: The Perky Ent. Enough said.

Merry: davem, but only because davem himself has made me realise that Merry is learned, a bit of a lone wolf, a bit odd, and much more complex than he at first appears. . .just like davem!

Sam: SaucepanMan, because he loves his beer, his family, and he always carries his pots with him.

EDIT The following is posted below in post #20; as it constitutes something of a rule change, I am copying it here for the benefit of newcomers to the thread:

I could go on and on and list every character from The Lord of the Rings but I shall not do that until Fordim gives the go ahead.

Fordim has already opened the floor to filling the roles of the baddies with Downers! Above I provided the following list:

The Witch-King of Angmar: Pio as she is a leader whom you do not want to cross!

The Balrog: The Wight himself, because sometimes he just scares the living bejeesus out of me ("Ai, Ai!").

Saruman: davem because I fear he may know more than is good for him.

Shelob: A very tricky one indeed, but I shall have to say Mithalwen for I have learned how dangerous it is to cross her.

The Watcher in the Water: Son of Numenor, as he's always lurking, alway ready to pounce, and always able to go right after the most important part of any discussion; also, no matter how many tentacles you cut off, there's always more (OK, I don't really know what that last part means. . .)

Assorted orcs: Well, Kransha, obviously.

Other posters have already opened the floor to Faramir, Eowyn and Arwen, so I suppose that they are fair game now too.

As the progenitor and patron saint of this thread, however, I will use my power to tweak the rules once more:

1. Posters may cast other characters of or from LotR after they have provided a full list for the Fellowship itself or for the baddies.

2. To avoid hundreds of posts that consist of single-character attribution, you must provide either a Fellowship list, or a Baddies List before any extra casting. For posters who have already provided a Fellowship or a Baddies list, however, they can go ahead with any extra casting they wish.

I am a dictator. I crave power. Bow down to me all and obey my rules.

[Child of the 7th Age]

Fordim,

"Boromir?" Ack! Now you've gone and done it. What a dreadful fate!

Are the persons honored allowed to register formal complaints? Child as Boromir ....."thanks to her formidable presence on the thread, and the fact that I'm not entirely sure about her motives......" (By the way, what do you mean when you refer to "the thread"? And I won't even ask about my motives...)

Many people are intrigued by Boromir and the theme of repentance, especially as depicted in the movies, but I am not among among their number. If truth be told, I have been one of Faramir's "fangirls" for endless years and could sense very early that a tiny piece of the author lay at the heart of that character. Tolkien tells us Faramir "had a 'bossy' brother." I can be accused of a lengthy list of shortcomings, but being bossy isn't one of them.

However, please do not change your designation. I will save the post in my scrapbook of cherished memories.

I wonder if there are any others who will quail when they see their name in this spot?

**************************

Now, on to the real purpose of this thread. Here is my take on the characters. You haven't said that we can't include ourselves in this list, so I am going to do that. And I just can't narrow my choices to one: the talent here is too rich, so I am going to "cheat".

Gandalf - BW certainly would be excellent in this spot, but I will make another suggestion: that of Fordim . He puts forward good ideas (usually ). He waves his staff and folk appear, helping him to achieve his goal by offering interesting ideas on the threads he's started.

Merry - Heren Istarion is one of the most helpful and fun people on the Downs and often comes up with insights out of nowhere that show, underneath that friendly exterior, quiet thoughts run deep.

Pippin - Bird is long retired from the site but her older posts still make me laugh more than any others. For a current poster, and for similar reasons although with a different style of humor, I would pick Lush .

Samwise - Me -- Child I am definitely a Hobbit. I was born a Harfoot and, despite many changes in my life, I am still a Harfoot. I admire the Frodos of the world with all my heart, but can never be one myself. I am stubbornly loyal to those I care for, to the point where I will toss everything out the window to fulfill my obligations to them.

Legolas - I am in a terrible quandry here because I have a three-way tie: Littlemanpoet , Davem , or Bethberry . The quality of their creative endeavor is such that I am sure they must be Elves.

Gimli - Regin Hardhammer All you have to do is look at his avatar.

Aragorn - Another tie: Esty and Pio . I am in awe how both of them handle their forums with grace and finesse, keeping things rolling while respecting the independence of those who come within their demesne. If I had to choose a ruler/leader, I would pick one of them.

Finally, Boromir - I hereby decline this honor for myself and reserve the spot for the Inktomi Slurp spider. I never know what he is up to and he seems to be everywhere at once.

*****************************

You assume Frodo is a given, but I would select Lyta Underhill , Mark 12_30 , or Nurumaiel . Underneath their polite exteriors, I am convinced there are reflections aplenty: both sweet and sad intermingled, and a longing for something that lies beyond the shores of Middle-earth.

[Feanor of the Peredhil]

Fordim, you amaze me. It seems like all of my favorite 'new' threads are your doings. My fellowship would have to be...

Gandalf: Keeper of Dol Goldur (don't let him know I said this ). He is extremely intelligent, is also 'street smart' and can work his way out of interesting situations, and his advice is constantly invaluable to me.

Aragorn: Mithalwen, I suppose. PM discussions with her are highly educational, not to mention amusing, and she tends to convey a slight aura of hidden power.

Legolas: Esty. Don't ask why, because I'm not entirely sure. She just seems right for the part.

Gimli: Burrahobbit! Burra's got a bit of a Dwarf-like habit of speaking bluntly, but his intelligence and steadfastness would be quite good to have along.

Boromir: The hardest of all the choices, and reserved for last. I tend to gloss over the fact that he tried to get the Ring in my mind, and see only his good qualities (loyalty, friendship, strength, intelligence, etc) and so I'm thinking that maybe Elennar Starfire should get this role.

Sam: I'll agree with Fordim on this one... Saucie's got Sam.

Merry: Amanaduial the Archer: she's always on top of things, and quick to let you know that you're on the right track (or to give suggestions on what the right track actually is).

Pippen: Morsul the Dark [chocolate chip]. Or Eomer of the Rohirrim. Both widely known for their senses of humor. Eomer also because of the accent.

Wow... that was tough.

Fea

[mark12_30]

Boromir Earnest, driven, valiant, always one of the first into the fray; strong with strong opinions, occasionally retracted; -- davem.

Gandalf: Hidden and too-easily-overlooked reserves of power, wisdom, and insight? Mister Underhill.

Aragorn: Quiet, authoritative, knowledgeable, and steady: Mithadan.

Legolas: Soft tread, sure aim, far sight, gentle humor, skilled storytelling. littlemanpoet.

Gimli: Dependable, hardworking, stout, reliable, and not one to back down from a quarrel: Imladris.

Merry: If he can organize a quest as well as he can organize his thoughts, we're all set. Fordim

Pippin: Energetic, affable, courageous, surprisingly resourceful, and unquenchably cheerful-- Heren-Istarion.

Sam: Sharon. She said it best.

Frodo: I'll agree with Sharon on this, too.

[Bêthberry]

A mirthful thread indeed, Mr. Hedgethistle. And at my back I now must hear the panting breaths of fangirls hurrying near?

But what is this? Something uncanonical! Women in the Fellowship? Who allows such cross dressing? Not I. I shall limit my selection to male members of the Downs and left the disstaff side be representd on another thread for the female characters, perhaps set up by a gentleman as gracious and mirthful as Heren Istarion.

Placing my finger aside my nose, my nominees are these:

Frodo: Son of Númenor, for his serious side, and also because I suspect he would not look askance at the chance to relieve Farmer Maggot of a few mushrooms.

Sam: davem, for his persistence and dedication and also for his knowledge of folklore, or perhaps Essex.

Merry: Heren Istarion, for his cheerful dedication to learning English as the Professor would want us to.

Pippin: Rimbaud, the boy who won't grow up (although I agree that Perky would be a good choice as well).

Legolas: Envinyatar, whose ears may be pointy or not but whose pen is as straight and true as an elven arrow and who is more far-sighted than many realise.

Gimli: SaucepanMan, for his fascination with the implements of metal works. And because sitting at the dock of the bay is one way to describe Gimli's sailing west.

Boromir: none other than Fordim Hedgethistle himself, for the temptation of the Canonicity thread.

Aragorn: Kransha, for his eye to military traditions

Gandalf the Grey: Mr. Underhill, whose courtesy and wit abounds and whose magic with the wands of programming has helped BW maintain the site

Gandalf the White: Squatter of Amon Rûdh, who has been know to post with a bite such as The White is allowed, and whose own programming skills helped complete the site's move to new and better programming.

(Well, okay, this last one is fudging things a bit, but that's what mirth is for, right?)

scampishly submitted,
hey dol merry dol

[Kransha]

Originally Posted by Bêthberry

Aragorn: Kransha, for his eye to military traditions

O fair Bethberry, I know not what to say! When I first saw the purpose of this thread, I though 'pity that this applies only to Fellowship members, for I shall never be picked.' I fancy I'm more like Erestor of Barliman Butterbur, with my semi-intelligent pretentiousness. Never had I dreamed of being equated with such a pivotal and crucial role. Many, many thanks *wonders what I would look like with a broken sword and a much greasier beard*.

For my ideal Fellowship...erm...

Gandalf: Guess who...yes, that's right: Fordim Hedgethistle Esq.. His reputations record-breaking prowess is proof enough. He has the intelligence and good-naturedness of Gandalf the Grey, perhaps not cranky or decrepit enough to be Gandalf the White, but the right amount of canonical righteousness.

Aragorn: Estelyn Telcontar. Trust me, folks, I have my reasons.

Legolas: Just like everyone else, I must, despite the gender barrier, choose Bethberry. She has a sage-like but sunny Elvishness running through her veins, as best as I can tell, and brings the reserved, peaceful humor of Legolas to many threads, though she has been known to go further into the realm of unadulterated mirth.

Boromir: I haven't the foggiest.

Gimli: Kurahuran (did I spell that right?). I mean, he IS a dwarf, is he not?

Frodo: Oddly enough, Son of Numenor always struck me as a very apt Frodo. I'm not sure why, but he just did. Sort of quiet, but resolute and knowledgeable in his own way, with a gentle authority too.

Sam: The Saucepan Man, for penultimate reasons. There is also a certain jollity in ol' Saucie (excuse my nicknaming ineptitude) that makes me feel that he is the perfect Samwise Gamgee. I am convinced that Tolkien had The Saucepan Man in mind when he created Sam, or was at least inspired by the foresighted knowledge of him.

Merry: Rimbaud. Yes, I'm switching the ideals here, but I've never formally met Mr. Rimbaud, though I've read his posts in awe. He seems to have the playful seriousness that Merry had, more serious than, perhaps, Pippin, but still vigorous and energetic in a refreshing way...sort of like vodka on a hot day...or pipe-weed...

Pippin: The Perky Ent. I mean, it's obvious to me. Perky's a bit of a prankster, comical to Pippin's extent, with the same youthful verve...Plus, I think I'm having deja vu about writing this reason, so it must be some trite contrivance of divine intervention...at least remotely involved...I suppose...

I wonder, though, perhaps this should be 'A Downer LotR. As said, I thought originally that I could never be thought to resemble a Fellowship member, but perhaps another member of the cast. What other characters could be replaced by Downers?

I mean, who better to replace Eomer than Eomer of the Rohirrim. It's as if there was no difference. And, I can think of a good many reasons why Morsul the Dark would be a better Dark Lord than Sauron. I, of course, would be lucky to get away with Grima Wormtongue.

[Fordim Hedgethistle]

Ack Child, me goof -- I meant to say that you have a formidable presence in this forum (although your post to the thread has made me an honest man in my error).

And, au contraire, I did not 'neglect' Frodo. The initial post says that if you were Frodo, who would you replace with whom in the Fellowship. This also would seemingly preclude having yourself in there twice. . .

Bethberry, shame on you for raising the canonicity topic. Go to the back of the room and write out "I will be a good Downer" five hundred times.

Finally, Kransha, ah my oldest Downer friend, I did lament the fact that there was no place for you in the Fellowship. You are, not to put too fine a point upon it, too evil! However, in the interests of fairness, I shall amend the purpose of this thread somewhat. . .

Decide either whom from the Downs you would see in the Fellowship with you (if you were Frodo) or whom from the Downs you would have as your allies if you were Sauron. To begin:

The Witch-King of Angmar: Pio as she is a leader whom you do not want to cross!

The Balrog: The Wight himself, because sometimes he just scares the living bejeesus out of me ("Ai, Ai!").

Saruman: davem because I fear he may know more than is good for him.

Shelob: A very tricky one indeed, but I shall have to say Mithalwen for I have learned how dangerous it is to cross her.

The Watcher in the Water: Son of Numenor, as he's always lurking, alway ready to pounce, and always able to go right after the most important part of any discussion; also, no matter how many tentacles you cut off, there's always more (OK, I don't really know what that last part means. . .)

Assorted orcs: Well, Kransha, obviously.

Here's to some more silliness!