[morwen edhelwen]

All right, so this is inspired by "That 70s Show", which is one of my favourite TV shows, other than "The Mentalist'. It's an AU, and I got the idea from jeanster's Leave It to Beaver parody "Leave It To Frodo" on the Straight Dope Message Board. NOTE: Some scenes are skipped because the Pilot episode is long. And some of the language is the same, although the text is mostly mine meant to represent the same ideas as the Pilot)

So here it is

That Third Age Show Pilot
(Theme snippet. White text on a black screen reads "Frodo Baggins' Basement, Hobbiton, The Shire, 8 pm. FRODO is sitting next to his relatives MERRY and PIPPIN, and the room also contains EOWYN, who lives down the street, SAM, and ARAGORN)

MERRY Come on Frodo, do it.

FRODO (looks at both Merry and Pippin) Why can't you or Pippin do it? It was your idea.

PIPPIN:Yeah but Frodo, you live here. It's your house.

MERRY: And if you don't do it, the ale will be gone
FRODO: But what about Gandalf? He'll see it.

MERRY: Frodo! I need that ale.

EOWYN: Just avoid my uncle if you're going to the kitchen

FRODO: What?

EOWYN: He's been acting different and looking different recently. Older.
Look, just don't look at him.

FRODO: OK.

PIPPIN: Remember the ale!

(FRODO makes this way upstairs. The hallway is crammed with guests from the neighbourhood. FRODO bumps into his uncle BILBO)
BILBO: Oh hi, Frodo.

FRODO: Hi, Uncle Bilbo.

BILBO (taking ale from the counter) Anyone want more food? Would you put these on the table?
FRODO: Sure, Uncle Bilbo.
(FRODO grabs hold of the ale. He puts some on the table but takes just enough for himself. As he walks back downstairs he runs into THEODEN)

FRODO: Mr. Theoden!

GANDALF: Theoden looks like-- what happened to Theoden? Humans don't age that fast.

FRODO: Someone cursing his ***?

GANDALF: Frodo, don't say that. You're still a young hobbit. And what are you carrying?

FRODO: Uh, just some ale

GANDALF: Put it away.

FRODO: I will, Gandalf.

(FRODO walks downstairs. As the kitchen door closes, a snippet of conversation between BILBO and GANDALF can be heard)

GANDALF: Still have that ring, Bilbo?

BILBO: Yes. But I've been thinking that I might give it to Frodo.

(The basement. FRODO rushes down with the ale)
FRODO: Guys! My uncle's giving me his ring!

ARAGORN: You're getting the ring?

FRODO: Yeah! The one he got from Gollum that can turn you invisible.


(MERRY has spotted the ale.)

MERRY: Well, the most important thing is- Frodo stole some ale! (He raises a toast) To Frodo!

ALL: To Frodo!

FRODO: This is the happiest day of my life!

(The Basement again, a few days later)

MERRY: So how are things with the ring?

FRODO: He hasn't really decided whether or not to give it to me yet. I think he secretly wants to keep it. He keeps on calling it his "precious".

(A knock on the door. ARWEN, Aragorn's girlfriend, comes in)

ARWEN: Hi Aragorn! Hey I heard about Frodo's ring. Can I have a look?

ARAGORN: You came here just to have a look at Frodo's ring?

(To be continued)